Stay With Me
by Sammy41
Summary: Lux has a nightmare. Will it be Cate's chance to mend old wounds?
1. Chapter 1

_I found this on my computer and thought I'd post it. It's rather short and I'm not sure if I'll leave it as a one-shot or continue it to be something more. Just a short Cate/Lux bonding moment. I think it would come sometime mid-season when Cate and Ryan are kind of seperated...not that that really matters for this piece! _

* * *

It was the fourth night in a row.

The first time she had dismissed it as a simple dream. A usual occurrence that happened to almost everyone at least once.

The second time had worried her a little more. She asked her about it the next morning only to get a stone wall of no answers and a shrug.

The third time she had nearly bounded into her room as if she could save her from the night terror but decided against it. If there was one thing she could say about her daughter it was that she liked her privacy. It seemed that sometimes trying to help did more harm than good.

But this fourth night, as the uneasy whimpers and unconscious screams pulled her from rest, she could not find it in herself to ignore whatever was taking place above. She ungracefully pulled herself out of bed, tripping over her feet as she crossed the cold hardwood floor. In the darkness she could spot the outline of her oversized college sweatshirt and hastily pulled it over her head, sliding the long sleeves over her icy hands. She tripped once more on her way for the door and for a moment paused to worry about making so much noise; until coming to another harsh realization that her bedside was as empty as it had been for nearly the past month.

Her steps stopped as she came to the attic ladder. She folded her arms across her chest, listening carefully to the ruffling of sheets and cries that came from the room above. Logic told her to go back to bed. But her emotions and her heart, and something that she had come to recognize as a maternal instinct, had her nearly sprinting to be at her daughter's side. She pulled in a calming breath. _"Don't screw this up Cate," _she murmured to herself as she twisted her hands in apprehension. It seemed that was all she knew how to do when it came to her daughter but now more than ever she prayed that she could do something right. She had been trying to prove herself for months. Trying to prove to both herself and Lux that she was capable of being a mother. Now as another chance presented itself she found she was shaking with panic and swallowing down pits of fear.

She carefully climbed the steps of the ladder, timidly placing one foot in front of the other and retaining her balance the best she could. With each move closer Lux's panting and yelps became louder and had her heart clenching tighter. The room was dark when Cate finally entered and she walked slowly to ensure that she did not stumble over loose shoes or unkempt laundry.

"Lux . . ." she whispered gently. Her voice was hardly audible over the thrashing that took place on the bed as the sixteen year old tossed and turned with her dreams.

"No!" Lux cried out, eyes still sealed shut in fitful sleep. "Stop!"

Cate moved without hesitation now, propelled by the pain of her child and less concerned with the after effects. She pulled the chain of the infamous bong lamp, illuminating the bedside in a subtle glow. She simultaneously found a spot on the side of Lux's mattress as she gently grabbed one of her slender shoulders. "Lux, honey, it's just a dream," she said in an attempt to pull her from sleep.

"No . . ." she whimpered.

"Lux," Cate said more firmly, nudging her with a little more force. "Lux, it's Cate. You're having a nightmare. Wake up. Lux!"

With a harsh draw of air Lux bolted up in bed, sweat dampening the back of her neck and her face flushed of all color. Tears clung to the corners of her cerulean eyes as she panted helplessly for air as if she had just sprinted a hundred yards. "Oh God," she breathed with a sob.

"It's okay now," Cate told her gently. Her voice shook as she said the words, unable to comprehend exactly what was taking place. "You were just having a nightmare . . ."

Once setting eyes on her mother, Lux's tears came more quickly and in an instant Cate had thrown her arms around her, pulling her in for a close embrace. Lux melted in her grasp, shuddering violently with each sob, clinging helplessly to Cate as more cries ripped through her.

"Shhh," Cate soothed softly. She rubbed gentle circles on Lux's back and rested her chin on the top of her head of blonde locks. Only worry gripped her as she sought to understand the magnitude of the situation. In her heart she knew something much greater was waiting for the pair and she shivered as she waited on the prospect. "Its okay, Lux. It's okay . . ."

She could say nothing in response. The recurring nightmare had sucked all the life and energy out of her. She leaned desperately into Cate, allowing her head to rest limply on her chest and relishing in the comfort granted from her mother's tender arms. Her tears soaked into Cate's University of Oregon sweatshirt, forming a damp spot on the front. A surprising calm came over her at Cate's familiar sweet smell, a strange combination of lavender and the cold Portland streets. Her voice was softer now than it had ever seemed possible had anyone heard her on the radio. It was soothing and made her feel warm and safe. In fact for the first time in her life she could only feel nurture surrounding her.

And suddenly she thought she finally knew what a mother felt like.

"You're okay now," Cate was whispering gently.

"I'm sorry," Lux managed as her cries slowly subsided, making it easier for her to breathe.

"No don't be sorry, honey," she replied, rubbing down the hair on the back of her head. There was silence for a moment as Lux's sobs calmed and Cate no longer had to hush her. After a moment of quiet, she swallowed hard and cleared her throat. "Lux, what were you dreaming about?"

She could feel Lux stiffen beneath her and another soft whimper escaped her lips. Her voice cracked as she answered, "The past."

"Do you want to talk about it?" Cate asked timidly. It secretly killed Cate to be cut out of a part of Lux's life. To be in the dark of her past. It killed her more to know that whatever grief stemmed from said past was existent because of her.

"No," Lux answered weakly.

"Okay," she whispered. A moment of quiet passed again and Cate shifted her position, causing Lux to nearly jump with fright and panic.

"Cate," Lux whimpered in alarm. "Don't leave me."

Her heart shattered at the words and she hugged her daughter closer. "I won't. I won't," Cate insisted softly. "I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere."

Lux's body slackened with ease once more, resting back against Cate who had moved herself so her back was against the headboard. She sighed in relief and nestled deeper into her mother's hold. "Thanks Cate," she whispered as she closed her eyes again and stifled a yawn.

"Of course," she replied gently. "I'm here Lux. And . . . and whenever you're ready to talk, I'll be here. I don't . . . I don't know what's wrong, but I want to help make it okay."

"You can't," Lux told her sadly.

"I can try," Cate said hopelessly. She kept her arm close around Lux as she pressed her cheek to the top of her head. Tears peeled slowly from her mahogany eyes and a lump grew in her throat. "They hurt you, didn't they?"

"I don't like to talk about it," Lux whispered hoarsely.

Cate shuddered at the response. It killed her. But she couldn't avoid it any longer. She had to know, even if it hurt her and Lux in the process. "But you dream about it?" Cate asked.

"I don't like to talk about it."

"Lux, what did they do to you?"

"I don't like to talk about it!" Lux exclaimed, sitting up. Sobs overcame her again. "Please Cate. Please, don't make me. I don't like to talk about it. I don't like to talk about it. I don't like to talk about it."

"Shhhhh," Cate hushed frantically as Lux continued to chant in hysterics. She pulled her back into her arms, rocking her back and forth. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. You don't have to . . ."

"I don't like to talk about it . . ." Lux drifted off with a sniffle.

"I won't make you," she whispered. "But nothing bad is going to happen to you again, Lux. Okay? I'm not going to leave you again. You're safe here."

"I know," she said.

"I love you, Lux," Cate whimpered genuinely.

"I love you too, mom," Lux murmured back, eyes fluttering with one last blink before she fell into rest.


	2. Chapter 2

The silence was almost unbearable. Cate Cassidy had never been one all too fond of it to begin with. The quiet made her uneasy and anxious. And recently it seemed that silence was all she faced.

Ryan and herself had agreed to more space, meaning he chivalrously packed his bags and bunked with a local friend from college. The empty bedside was a painful reminder and the quiet mornings were torture. Hell, Cate would have even put up with Paige for a few more weeks if it meant missing this.

The problem was that Lux was quiet. For once she wasn't mad. Not at Cate, not at Baze, or anyone that either parent was aware of. She was mellow. And that wasn't Lux. After her late night terror in which Cate came to her rescue, it seemed the teenager had only gotten worse instead of better. Cate could still muse on the morning after. . .

"_Morning…" she greeted her, seated at the table with the paper open and coffee in hand. Lux shuffled in almost timidly, as if she were ready to turn on a heel and sprint off at any sign of trouble. "You doing okay?" _

"_Fine," Lux said meekly. _

_A frown pulled at Cate's mouth. "No more nightmares?" _

"_It was fine," she murmured. "I'm sorry for waking you."_

"_Lux, you don't have to be sorry," Cate said instantly. Her face softened. "Honey, I just want to help you with whatever you're going through." _

"_Well, you don't have to," Lux replied, taking a firmer stance. That was Cate's only comfort. Somewhere inside the girl standing in her kitchen was still her Lux. _

"_I want to," she told her. "Why don't you just tell me what you were dreaming about?"_

"_I don't want to," Lux snapped. "I don't even remember." _

"_What do you mean you don't remember?"_

"_I don't remember."_

"_But Lux, I was up there in your room. You wouldn't let me leave."_

"_Yeah, well, I was half-asleep," she insisted softly. Her eyes glazed with a new somberness and she seemed to shrink before Cate's eyes, as if retreating back into herself. "Please, just don't ask me about it. I promise it was just a bad dream." _

Everything in Cate's head screamed at her to keep prying. She shouldn't have taken Lux's word. She knew that now.

While no more screeching nightmares woke her in the middle of the night, she still couldn't help but be taken back by the subtle changes in Lux. For one she had seemed to have lost her edge. Her voice was a little less crisp. Her comebacks a little less biding. The truth was, Cate should have enjoyed this new Lux, but she didn't. In fact it was the opposite; this new Lux scared her.

Then came the discrete startles. With every shut of a cabinet, slam of a door, and unpredictable thump, a nervous jump came from Lux. When Cate first noticed it, she began to wonder how long it had been going on. Perhaps this entire time Lux had been skittish. Of course that conclusion was little comfort.

The last of the worrisome signs was Lux's newfound habit of staring off, as if deep in an intricate thought. Nothing would ever come of the haze, only Lux's empty blue eyes searching for something that wasn't there. Every once in awhile Cate would shake her out of it or ask her what was wrong, and each time Lux would snap back to reality and harness her former composure with franticness. By the time Math had reported that the teenager seemed to be frequently "zoning out" in class to Cate, she felt she was running out of time, options, and in essence, failing her daughter.

"Something is wrong, Baze," Cate said.

He shook his head as he loosened his tie. "I haven't noticed anything different," he said.

"That's because you're not her mother," she murmured.

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing," Cate sighed.

Baze gave her a sympathetic smile. She cast her eyes down to avoid his soft gaze, hating herself for melting at the simple raise of his dimples. "Hey, look at me," he said gently. Cate hesitantly complied. "She's going to be fine."

She shook her head. "No. No I really don't think so," she insisted. "Baze, call me crazy, but I just have this horrible feeling. Lux isn't herself and as her mother I have an obligation to help. To do something. I feel like I've failed her once already . . ."

"Cate," Baze cut her off quickly, "don't start doing this to yourself. I hate when you talk like that. Lux is going to tell us what's wrong on her own time. All she needs is for us to be there when she's ready. If you haven't noticed already, pushing her doesn't seem to be the way to fix things, even if it's in her best interest."

At his words, Cate suddenly knew why she had come to visit the father of her child. For a pause she lost herself, amazed at how quickly he had transformed. She would have never guessed that Baze would become this man. The man she could raise a child with. The man she could depend on to soothe her worries. But there he was, unbuttoning the collar of his shirt after a day on the job (a real job), shedding light on her debacle as if he had been parenting for decades.

"You're right," she said.

"Wow, you didn't even looked pained when you said it this time," Baze teased.

Cate rolled her eyes and gave him a playful hit to the chest. "Shut up," she scoffed.

"Ow," he winced with a grin. "Nice right hook Rocky."

A smile broke across her face and almost instantly Baze mirrored the gesture. For them it was easy. That was what Cate had always felt at least. Being with Baze was natural. She was entirely herself and he seemed to be just as at ease with her. They seemed to move and speak and interact as if it were all an old dance. And when it happened, something inside of Cate grew warm.

Still, relationships were the last thing on Cate's mind. The awkward tension between her and Ryan at work that had surfaced in the past week was enough to turn her off to any prospects. No, her focus was tangled with Lux, who despite Baze's assurances was not getting better.

She had gone to Tasha. The truth was, the girl was beginning to grow on her. Cate would admit that she was skeptical at first, but Tasha had proven to be grateful and for the most part responsible. Unlike Lux, Tasha took her new guardians as an opportunity– one that she didn't want to screw up. She fit in at Westmonte quickly, her grades were decent, and she seemed to be clicking with the social scene of the high school rather well. Yes, Tasha had a leg up on Lux, and for reasons Cate could only guess were buried in her daughter's past.

"Thanks for the groceries," Tasha said as Cate dropped a bag to the small table of her apartment.

"Anytime. You know the drill. Just tell me when you're running low."

Tasha nodded and as silence overcame them, a guilty frown pulled at her face. "Listen, Cate, I just want to apologize for . . ."

"It's done with Tasha," Cate said.

"I don't want you to not trust me," Tasha replied. "Or think that I'm ungrateful for everything you've done for me."

"You don't have to worry Tasha, all right?" Cate told her.

The young girl gave a sheepish nod. When she looked back at Cate, she found her face had turned a new sort of serious.

"Listen, Tasha, I need you to be honest with me for a second…" she began. "Has Lux been acting different?"

"Different how?"

"I don't know. Spacing out. Jumping at noises," Cate said softly. She watched in concern as Tasha looked away from her, avoiding eye contact. "Tasha?"

"I don't know," she told her pointedly.

Cate's brow furrowed. "What do you mean you don't know? You're with her as much as I am, if not more," she countered.

"Cate, you're putting me in a bad position . . ."

"I don't care what kind of position I'm putting you in. This isn't about you, Tasha. This is about Lux. I'm really worried about her," Cate said. "Now please, tell me."

Tasha sighed. "She's been a little distant. And yes I've noticed the jumping thing she does. It's like she thinks no one sees," she whispered. "Listen, I don't know all the details. But I think I know someone who does . . ."

Valerie. Cate's meeting with Lux's former foster mother had been enlightening to put it blandly. And that night at dinner, a deep anxiety swirled in her stomach.

As usual, Lux pushed the food on her plate around rather than eating any of it. She seemed to think that if she spread it around enough, Cate wouldn't notice that hardly any of it was gone. And the quiet was back.

"Lux . . ." Cate started uneasily. "I spoke with - - - with Valerie."

There seemed to be a foreboding ring within the silence as the scrapping of Lux's fork suddenly stopped. Her eyes, fierce sapphires of emotion swiftly found Cate's.

"You what?" she asked.

"I spoke with Valerie. Your foster mom," Cate whispered. "Lux I just wanted to know about your past because you weren't telling me anything and . . ."

"You went behind my back!" Lux snapped viciously.

"I'm sorry for that Lux, but I'm not sorry for trying to help you," she replied, trying to retain a calm in her voice. "She told me that you got violent with her husband and that . . . ."

"She's a liar!"

"Well, then why don't you tell me the truth?" Cate shouted back.

More quiet followed.

"I want to help you."

"I don't need your help! I never have! I didn't ask for it! I didn't ask for you to take me in, I didn't ask for you to be my mom, I didn't ask for anything from you Cate! So quit acting like you're doing me some big favor!"

It was the kind of blow up that would have struck Cate silent. But tonight, like everything else lately, was different. Though her lower lip quivered and she flinched with the slightest bit of pain, Cate was overcome by a sudden resolve, even as Lux bolted up from the table, rattling the dishes on the table and knocking over her chair. Before she could run off, she raised her voice.

"Hey! Wait!" Cate barked. Lux froze, her back still facing her. "Lux, I don't care if you asked me to help you. I don't care what you think. I don't care if you hate me or if you're angry with me. But I am your mother and I am never going to stop trying to help you. I love you too much to stand by. You may not understand now, in fact you may not ever understand, but I am here, I am going to help, and I'm not going anywhere, whether you want me to or not."

A scowl pulled at Lux's milky white face and for that Cate was grateful. It was strange because lately she was grateful for any sort of spunk coming from her daughter, even if it was directed at her.

"Is that all?" Lux asked.

"No," Cate answered confidently now. "Put your dish in the sink. And if you want to get away from me you can go to your room. You're not leaving this house; it's a school night."

In the weeks that would follow, Cate's nights would be spent replaying the words spoken that evening over and over. Wondering if perhaps just that would have made the difference.

The following morning wasn't all too unusual. There was silence as Cate poured her coffee, silence as Lux pretended to eat breakfast. On the ride to school there was more silence. Of course this time it seemed to stem from Lux's anger at her mother rather than her recent bout of self-torment.

"I'll pick you and Tasha up from school today. I'm getting off work a little early," Cate told her as she pulled along the curb. Lux only continued fidgeting with her bag and pulled on the handle of the door. "Lux, did you hear me?"

"Yeah, okay, I'll be outside waiting," Lux rolled her eyes before slamming the door closed.

"_I'll be outside waiting." _

Cate would cringe at the words over and over. She wouldn't forget them. She wouldn't forget the hard squeeze that nearly crushed her stomach as Tasha waited for her at the curb six hours later.

"Where's Lux?" she asked.

Tasha yanked open the car door and closed it with urgency. "Something's wrong."

"_Something's wrong." _

She still got a chill when she remembered.

"What do you mean something's wrong? Where is she?"

"Just drive…"

Lux had left Westmonte High that Friday afternoon with one goal. Vengeance. Leaving Tasha behind, she had gone on a direct route for Valerie's house. And now as she stood before the home she had once called her own, she couldn't help but feel a tremble take over her left hand. It was discrete, but uncontrollable and quite suddenly a vile taste crawled up her stomach and touched the back of her throat. Her lungs seemed to deflate of air and she struggled to keep herself under control.

The memories hit her in a flash. It was amazing because she had spent so long repressing them. Now a single look at the familiar front porch was enough to rush her through memory lane, bringing back the pain and fear as if it were all that consumed her. Her cheeks became warm and sweat dampened her neck.

She wanted to turn back.

Like so many times, Lux wanted to quit.

But not this time. With a stubborn air that she was known for she stormed up the steps, school bag still slung over her shoulder, determination streaked across her face. She pounded the door with authority.

The instant she saw Valerie's face a fire brewed inside her. "Lux?" she gasped.

"You lousy, lying piece of trash," Lux growled. It came from deep within her. It was a voice not even recognizable to her own ears.

"What are you doing here?"

"You lied to Cate," she snapped. "You told her I was the violent one!"

"You shouldn't be here," Valerie hissed. "Go away."

"Why would you do that? Why? You protect your bastard husband . . ."

"Get out!"

"No! No, not until you tell the truth!"

"Hey!" a deep male voice interrupted. Lux's soul went cold. His gray eyes narrowed on her with a darkness that made her insides split. "What the hell are you doing here?"

"I-I . . ." she couldn't even speak. She hated that she was this afraid of him. Lux had always been afraid of him. She could hardly look at him now. "It's not important."

"Get the hell off my property."

"I was talking to Valerie."

"I said get the hell off!" Trey screamed now, brushing past his wife and grabbing a handful of Lux's hair, forcibly yanking her down the steps. "You little brat! You think you can just come here and yell at my wife?"

"Let go of me!" Lux screeched, squirming as he shoved her down the last step. She turned in his grasp and pushed at his chest but he hardly budged. Instead he yanked her head with more force, whipping her neck back around and making her yelp with further pain.

"Hey!"

In the commotion they hadn't even noticed the car along the sidewalk, nor the woman who emerged. Cate was warm with adrenaline as she slammed the driver side door closed, hissing at Tasha to stay inside, as she approached. Seeing the way Lux was being handled made her hair stand on end.

"You let go of her right now!" Cate ordered as she stalked over, closing in on them in a matter of seconds. Trey didn't budge right away, instead looking up in surprise while keeping one hand on Lux. "Did you hear me? Let go of my daughter!"

With this Cate shoved his wide chest with all the might she could muster (which wasn't much to begin with). He turned more scarlet with anger and tossed Lux off to the side as Cate continued with a few more angry pushes. Trey quickly grabbed her flailing hands, gripping her wrists so tightly that she nearly called out in pain.

"Lux get in the car," Cate told her daughter, who still sat petrified on the grass where she had fallen, gazing up at her mother with a pair of helpless baby blues.

"You tell your brat to stay the hell away from my house!"

"Let go of me!" Cate screamed at him, angrily shoving at him again. This time Trey fired back with a swift hand, which struck harshly across her face.

"Cate!" Lux yelled in terror.

Almost immediately Cate brought a hand to her cheek, trying to recover quickly from the unwarranted blow. She bent over for a moment, vision blurring temporarily on the damp grass. The dog barking in the background seemed to distort with the chorus of frightened and angry yelling.

"Trey, stop!" she could hear Valerie screaming. When she looked up again Trey had shoved his wife to the ground and she made no attempt at rising. Perhaps she knew better.

"Lux get in the car!" Cate barked at her daughter once more. Lux was still standing dumbfounded, eyes a glaze and pitted with deep rooted fear. It was as if she couldn't move. A deer in the headlights.

"Cate, I called the police!" Tasha announced. She had left the car as Cate had specifically asked her not to do, and her news seemed to only aggravate her former foster father more.

"Trey, come inside!"

"Shut up!" he screamed. His glare narrowed past Cate's shoulder, toward Tasha who had grabbed Lux by the arm to join her. Trey stepped toward them, his jaw locked in rage, but Cate quickly blocked his path.

"You're not going to touch those girls," she warned.

"Like hell I'm not," Trey growled, easily nudging her aside.

Cate wouldn't remember what had gotten into her in that instant. She could hardly recall her fingers balling up or the way she quickly held her ground in front of him. Nor would she remember the successful punch that she threw at Trey Gilbert's face with complete clarity. All she knew was that it had happened.

As soon as her fist made contact across his jaw and continued to his nose, a swarm of raw pain ruptured within her hand. She cried out, immediately grabbing it within her other hand, gasping as she saw white. Trey was taken back, his eyes aflame as he snapped his head back into place. Cate was in too much pain to even stand up straight, let alone even get her vision under control, so when she heard the wailing of sirens she couldn't have been more grateful.

When two police cars came skidding to a loud halt by the curb, she could feel relief; if only for a moment. As the officers rushed past to get to Trey and Valerie, Cate moved only for Lux.

She was trembling. By the time Cate grabbed her into an embrace, Lux seemed to be hanging on by nothing more than a thread. "It's okay," Cate assured her. "It's okay now. It's okay . . ."

Lux just continued shaking, clinging desperately to her mother as if her life depended on it. She was in complete shock or worse as far as Cate could tell, and was distant in a way that made her fill with further alarm.

"Can someone tell me what's going on here?" an officer asked, approaching the trio. Cate and Lux seemed in no position to answer so Tasha cleared her throat.

"I was the one who called," she said nervously. "I was watching from the car and Trey was being rough with Lux. And then when Cate tried to stop him, he hit her. That's when I called 911."

"This is just a misunderstanding," Valerie was bargaining in the background to the pair of officers who were with her and Trey. "She hit my husband!"

"Listen, we're going to need to get a statement here or take you all into the station," the officer told Cate.

"No," Cate insisted. She had a hand on the back of Lux's head, as if she were protecting her from all harm. She shook her head. "I can't leave her right now. I need to stay with her."

"Besides, you don't need to take them in. That ass hole over there is the one who should be getting charged with assault and battery," Tasha added.

"Tasha…" Cate whispered.

The officer shook his head. "I'm going to need to consult with my other officers. You are not to leave the premises, understand?"

Cate nodded, her focus still with Lux who had not stopped her trembling nor uttered a word. As soon as the officer left she led her toward the curb, and together the two took a seat, Lux still holding her mother. Almost unconsciously, Lux rocked back and forth as she sat and Cate didn't let go.

"Lux, honey, talk to me please," she whispered to her. Only Lux's blank stare answered back. "It's over now, okay? You're safe. You're safe . . ."

"Cate, what can I do?" Tasha asked.

She swallowed down hard. "Call Baze. Tell him to get here as soon as he can."

* * *

_All right so just another rough installment. It proceeds the last chapter and as you can tell fits in with the plot of season 2. I kept much of the Lux's abuse storyline the same, but with a different twist. I really wish Cate was (or had been) more directly involved with what happened that night and I think this spin kind of gives that. Personally I think the writers could have gone far with the storyline but they keep mucking it up by bringing in Baze and Cate's romantic interests and Lux's creepy teacher fling. Anyway that's my opinion haha. I appreciate reviews! thanks! _


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